strange things you find in the internet while listening to urbandub (for the first time)

although i doubt anyone who reads my blog would appreciate it,


Which Naruto Character Are You?
Test by naruto - kun.com

404

today all about being a burden. no matter how much you try to be useful, as long as you're born in the gemini zodiac and your parents gave you initals EVL, you'll end up becoming a curse to all the people you've been trying to be a blessing to. no matter how much you try to lighten loads or make lives more comfortable, you'll end up being the cross they have to carry...the cement wings on their shoulders...the shadow that suddenly gains weight...why is it that the people i don't care about gets the best from me while the people i care for end up having to put up with my worst performance... how can i make people i don't care about feel good about themselves and end up hurting those i hold dear... maybe God enjoys making me hope and making me care for things just to have the joy of turning them into the stakes that pierce my dark, corrupted heart. (simon belmont must die!)

...when you mess up with something once, maybe it's best never to try again...

zoom out

some strange thoughts while walking a while ago... Jose Rizal wrote several poems and stuff about the love for country, and how it can transcend all the other loves (as he said in Amor Patrio), even greater for a woman's love for her child... and how even the death of someone we love will eventually be forgotten (or at least be reduced to something that isn't of much imporantance). so it got me thinking...is there anything i have right now that is far more important than anything else? something that i can never afford to loose? maybe i don't...

anyway...zoom out is more on significance... we are but units, and the lost of one unit won't affect the body too much as a whole. so what if a grain of sand is washed into the ocean? so what if a single leaf falls off a tree? so what if a sheep is lost from the flock? so what if a person dies? only those directly near what is lost will weep, and eventually they will forget. they'll speak of that was lost in past tense, but then be able to smile again afterwards.

in the end, we are but another

we will be strangers until we die

the line above is from Bambi's forum signature. i have no idea what it means, but it kinda makes me think...we never really knew each other that well even if we thought we are "friends."

at nauutusan na naman niya ako. partly, i don't want to disappoint... too many people shed tears because of my incompetence, and i am trying to win her favor... partly, i don't think it would be fair for me, my past, and her... the whole thought of my distancing is to be free from relationships for a while... the light hardly even began to flicker, and already i can feel the flame dying out...

naalala ako ng kapatid ko nung naubusan siya ng friends na makakasama...bigla na lang nagtext na sabay kami magdinner. Tinatamad akong lumabas, sinabi ko sa roommate ko na papakilala ko siya sa kapatid ko... siya na lang maging boyfriend niya para siya na lang maging kasama niya sa pafkain... tinawag ba naman akong "kuya" ni roommate... *gago ka rodel* (kaya sumama na lang ako sa kapatid ko para magdinner)

and thoughts finalizing... maybe i should finish (urr..start) my PI 100 exam...

thougts... at least i got good nights (every now and then)

more random thoughts

JPIA
1. ang externals, malaking outflow ng perang binuo namin sa finance at FP (napunta sa bata ang perang pinaghirapan ko...)

2. swerte ang exte, hindi lang basta-basta "chair" ang chair nila. Sofa!

3. Malapit na ang meeting para sa tie-up project ng exte at e&r... e&r nga pala ako this sem... labo

4. parang may nawawala sa buhay ko ngayong hindi ako napapamura sa pagrush ng mga video. Suffering is an important part of life.

5. Hassle na naman ang commeets...

FOPC
1. Mainit sa FO tambay, di malamig ang C2. Di ko na siya nakikita... parang nasayang ata oras ko kanina.

2. Mahirap magtrabaho ng di mo alam ang trabaho

3. Pahamak sa masarap na tulog, pero ok lang... siguro

Dorm
1. Nagsisimula nang mawala ang mga ipis sa dorm...siguro... (out of sight out of mind)

2. Masaya magpalipad ng mga erplano at pumatay gamit ang missiles.

Financial
1. Nauubusan nanaman ng pera, pero OK lang, malapit na rin matapos at wala naman kelangang pagkagastusan ng walang dahilan... (nalimutan ko ata kunin ang labada ko)

ACADS
1. meron akong acads?

Personal
1. Getting over my random hatred for gay people....quickly being replaced by vain, metrosexual assholes who call themselves weird names like ultraguwapo and superpogi...

2. Nakausap ko na ang crush ni BoiBoi. Nagalit sakin si BoiBoi at natuwa at the same time. May stalker na ngayon si BoiBoi...

Vincent: I change people's lives.

Cy: For the worse

Lawrence: You ruin people's lives.

Vincent: Hehe. At least exciting na buhay mo

BoiBoi: Gago ka, Vincent (sabay ngiti)

there's an angel watching over me

this morning, while I was [trying to] study for my NAT SCI 1 exam, my summer roommate (the one who is currently being followed by spirits and thus the cause of our room's "special" aura) played a song. At first I thought he was just being an [censored]but when i recognized the lyrics it was the song used for a flash movie that became the beginning of my internet search for flash.

Here is the link to the flash movie. This is probably the exact inverse of the last flash link I posted. :)

today, i figured out that everything was just a misunderstanding. maybe i should stop worrying about things too much...i'm starting to get strange (but almost enjoyable) dreams.

and to the people who thinks I care for them. SMILE. :) Don't loose your head, it's probably the prettiest part of your body.

word for the day: euphemism

the smartest creature in the world

in my search for a dose of gothic bloody entertainment (it's one of those days that i enjoy watching ANIMATED blood and gore), i found a genius squirrel.

click here for his medium-lengthed flash clip of pure genius (Date Advising).

Parental Advisory: Contains Strong Expletive Language and Suggestive themes. Other clips of the same squirrel contains Blood and Gore and Sexual Themes. The website is recommended for those with moderate to strong stomachs.

Let's all cooperate in giving our children a healthy future.

...laziness....

...have a report for PI 100 tomorrow... only half done with the realizing process... reality sucks... I guess all the cancelled appointments were in vain. spent most of the 3 day vacation bumming in front of my PC doing bum stuff instead of PI 100 stuff. Oh well, at least this part of life is almost over.

May...I never thought I'd actually hate its coming... Turning 20 soon...and I am already 7 years too late to do things that teenagers usually do... *look back in past life...did I miss something important? nothing worth thinking too much about I guess*

Byke... although I doubt you'd ever see this, thanks. You just made me realize a few good things about myself (although i doubt that that was ever your intention). Even so, people in my direct sphere of influence are forbidden to be more depressed than I am, so cheer up. :) Life is much more fun that way. Ikaw rin, magmumukha ka pang mas matanda kesa sa akin.

Philosophical thought of the day: Sacrifice. *If I tell you I can save the life of the one you love by killing myself, will you ask me to do it?*

(--,) ==> self-portrait using keyboard characters. Labo ng buhay *sigh*